"Lexicon For Ladykillers"
by Ted Mark
from
Scamp
Vol. 3, No. 1, July 1959
When she says...
She means...
Able-bodied...........................................................Marriageable
Bachelor................................................................Abomination
Cad.......................................................................Former
lover
Doctor................................................................Mama's
choice
Eve....................................................................First
conqueror
Free Love..........................................................Expensive
affair
Gentleman...............................................................Big
spender
Hot Prospect.............................................................Single
man
Idiot...........................................Former lover's
current girlfriend
Job........................................................Gauge
of marriageability
Kiss.......................................................Investment
in the future
Love.................................................Justification
for the present
Mama......................................................The
absolute authority
No.................................................................................Maybe
Older Man.....................................................A
possibility if rich
Platonic...............................................................Without
hands
Queer..........................................................Confirmed
bachelor
Rhinestone.......................................Other girl's
engagement ring
Sex.............................................................................Marriage
Tense.......................................................................Oversexed
Unfit.....................................................................Married
man
Vice................Sex, smoking, drinking, or anything else
you enjoy
Wedding........................................................Ultimate
objective
X-Ray Eyes..........................Any eyes that focus below
her neck
Yes.............................................................................I
give up
Zeal....................................................................Pursuit
of man
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